I read a good definition and valuable thoughts on "moral courage" that I would like to share with You.
"Moral courage means doing the right thing even at the risk of inconvenience, ridicule, punishment, loss of job or security or social status,
etc. Moral courage requires that we rise above the apathy,
complacency, hatred, cynicism, and fear-mongering in our political
systems, socioeconomic divisions, and cultural/religious differences.
For parents, it frequently requires us to put aside compelling but
momentary pleasures or comforts in order to set a good example for our
children and be the parents we aspire to be. Doing the right thing
means listening to our conscience, that quiet voice within. Ignoring
that voice can lead to feelings of inadequacy, guilt and diminished
personal integrity. Moral courage requires us to make judgments about
what actions or behaviors are supportive of our highest ideals, and
which ones are destructive. It asks us to recognize our
responsibilities and see the consequences of our own actions."
(source. http://www.lionswhiskers.com/2011/02/what-is-moral-courage.html)
My question to You, as a topic for discussion, is: Do you see implications of this for what You are doing or would like to be doing in the context of the "BDSM environment" in SL, and if so, which are they?
(And yes, i am not using the word "BDSM community", on purpose.)
4 comments:
In my mind the 'BDSM environment' exists in 3 domains:
1. my head
2. Other kinky orientated heads
3. Non kinky thinking heads
And moral courage in this context makes an assumption we know what the right thing to do is.
I've heard it said again and again. You can't define ME. You can't pigeon hole me. I may do this kink or that kink, I may do it behind locked doors or in public. but your rules and conditions do not define me.
What role does moral courage have when I am unwilling to nail my colours to a particular flag?
I have been brave many times in my life. but rarely courageous. I have gone through life not learning all the facts. I have lept many times, often with my eyes shut. That is brave, but it's not courageous.
At the d/s academy I find the help I need to stop being brave and start developing my courage. Mirjam along with many who provide discussions, or contribute to them, give ME the insights that allow ME to see what the environment really is. They also encourage courage in the only way that these things can be. They display it themselves. Seeing and feeling how powerful this is touches me.
There is a flag that I can nail my colours to: I am kinky behind closed doors, online. My courage will be to change who I am online.
Great post, Mir. Thanks. Huge and complicated topic, I will speak on it only for myself!
And Estos, really good comments.
Moral courage is an ongoing aspiration of mine, because I am so often afraid.
I’ve been thinking about how to respond to this, and I think I’ll talk about nailing my colours to a flag. *grin*
I believe “the right thing” is complicated, individual, situational, often unknowable in an absolute sense, and at each moment no more than the best approximation I can make at the time. Which is unnerving in itself. And it’s easy to react defensively to others’ beliefs that I find threatening, Socially it’s simultaneously not PC to have an opinion about anyone else’s kink/lifestyle, and totally PC to wax eloquent about the Red Flags of Danger. Golly. My brain hurts.
So - moral courage includes not reacting defensively to beliefs that threaten my self-image; realizing that isn’t about me, that’s about someone else’s life and I can receive it and even celebrate it as such.
At the same time, there are areas I do have a judgment about, limits to the tolerance in Meadow’s World. In Meadow’s World, power exchange requires consent, and consent requires the real practical ability to say no. If one can’t say no, then saying yes is meaningless. And in Meadow’s World, interpersonal dynamics that make any member of the couple/family less capable of taking care of themselves, either emotionally or practically, are damaging at best, and evil at worst.
The dictates of tolerance and political correctness are often welcome antidotes to the all too human tendency to talk about what’s on our neighbors’ clotheslines. Moral courage requires both not getting all wrapped up in other people’s underwear choices, and being willing to choose and stand behind the limits to one’s tolerance.
I've been thinking this over and over too, trying to put my thoughts together enough for a coherent answer...here goes...not too sure whether I succeeded.
For me I think there are moral standards and obligation. Like Meadow, I feel that morals are very personal and whilst we may conform to a set of morals set down by society, ultimately it is our own standards and limits that will define them.
If we choose to act upon our moral obligations according to our standards then that may take courage at times....it may not at others.....because courage is also relative to the individual.
I think sometimes people confuse a moral obligation with something else...fear, anger, pride or ironically...cowardice.
Where do we draw the line between standing up for something we believe in and consider a moral obligation...and crossing into the realm of prejudice and bashing others for their morals of differing standards to our own?
It's a fine line I think....and possibly why some would choose to stand down and walk away rather than stand on a soapbox with a fist in the air.
Hope that makes some sense.....
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