Thought that title would get your attention a bit.
For the most part though, we think of discipline as being the corporal type when it comes to D/s but in essence, we all know that discipline can be your own self-discipline on many levels. Spiritually, emotionally, physically and mentally... even financial discipline is almost always a very strong trait to what "I" find as a good dominate.
Disciplining one's self to maintain a natural control in their life is and should be an obvious natural thing for them. Are they good with their money, do they require emotional ego stroking regularly, physically do they do their best to maintain themselves and how do they find a spiritual balance with themselves and their own faith? All of these should be fairly obvious to you in the first few conversations.
One sign that some Dominates are not being up front, or otherwise, giving you all the details is their in ability to give more than just vague answers. Of course, we don't expect them to give details of their financial goings on, but at least be able to find out where their beliefs are, education and other items from their history is a great way to see how well they take on a project and keep with it.
Perhaps in Second Life, we don't require knowing all of those items are maintained well, but getting to know the human behind the avatar is what I have always been about. Avatar's are the extension of one's self with a few tweaks to bring ourselves to a much more visually appealing and corporeal feeling of "what-we-should-have-been-like-if-we-had-a-choice" scenario.
Ultimately though, the thought process here is that a Master can only Master another after they master themselves. Being able to discipline themselves effectively and how they do it is a wonderful way to see how they will fit into your world as your Dominate.
I hope this gives insight as to how I perceive things, but of course, this is only one opinion... I encourage other's to help identify their 'key' traits to a perfect match.
2 comments:
Discipline for Dominants is more important than for submissives. Without it the whole edifice will fall apart.
You are rght, that unless we can Master ourselves, we cannot be a Master.
Great thoughts, thanks.
I think self-discipline in general is an essential skill for humans, it's the only way it's possible to learn a skill, reach a goal, be a reliable life partner, be a parent, and reach any level of spiritual or psychological growth.
The D/s dynamic does put the onus on Dominants to develop that skill relatively independently, whereas it's often expected that power exchange will be expressed in relationships by life coaching of subs by their Dom/mes.
I would assert that personal self-discipline is necessary to be a responsible submissive as well. I would call it a life skill that is more foundational than D/s, a life skill that, for each of us, underlies all our relationships with others.
Post a Comment